K Savage

She’s popular but down to earth. Super cute but also super smart. She has a way of lifting you up without making it weird. She’s your new girlfriend.

Named after Scarlett Johansson’s outfit in Avengers (Probably) and just as stunning, this dark beauty is a straight-up stinky, stony assassin, locked and loaded with gooey grapes and gas.

Flavor Notes: Earthy, Gassy, Fruity.

You know the drill: I Scream, you scream, we all scream, the neighbors complain. Luckily, this pretty pastry is light on the screamy and heavy on the dreamy. Combine a dash of gas, a float of funk & a tasty tease of tropical fruit & you’ll be buttered, baked and cooling on the windowsill in no time.

Remember when that sexy drummer took off his tank top during the second encore & threw it into the crowd & it hit you in the face & you took it home and smoked it? That was awesome. Anyway, this bad girl is nothing like that — just sour, funky diesel layered with sweet berries, citrus & complex herbal notes. Crank up the volume, it’s a sherbanger!

Sweet, buttery apple pastry just like mom used to rip. This frosty fall favorite pairs nicely with a hot cup of coffee or a six episodes of your favorite baking show.

Tastes like an everything bagel and feels like an everything everything. Dank, garlicky, gassy goodness with huge numbers that put you in a stanky elevator straight to the stankosphere.

Find out what all the fuss is about. This chonky heavy hitter is fresh and funky at the same time, just like you. Delivering a unique, euphoric high from both barrels, Kush Mints is a true smoker’s smoke and lowkey your new favorite.

Nothing lasts forever, but that doesn’t mean you can’t make your mark today. This inky stinky delight will have you tagging your Trapper Keeper and drawing mustaches on pictures of your ex in no time with its soapy, gluey blast of sugar & gas.

After decades of mediocre output, those silly Swiss finally got it right. This quality timepiece reads “4:20” twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week with absolute precision. How did they do it? Simple, they added a shit-ton of gas. The result is an iced-out daily driver whose only job is to tell time to go f*ck itself.

Cute, but with superpowers- Just like you! Its rich herbal, citrus & earthy notes turn your lightsaber green in less than a parsec. In fact, just one hit from this Jedi Mind Trick & you'll be opening & closing the fridge using only the force.

You’ve been working hard. Putting in all you’ve got. Time to enjoy a tall, refreshing bowl of Gelonade. It’s got the gas &terps to replenish your thirst & get you back where you belong: up the clouds like a goddamn kite. 

Sweet and heady, just like the great Nina Simone said it was. This lovely violet lady will lift you into a funky, floral haze swirling with notes of lavender and earthy pine. Perfect for a sunny afternoon, a cozy sofa session or anytime you're ready to get hypnotized by her strange delights.

​Do you have expensive taste? Do you drive a diamond motorcycle? Do you have a disco ball for a head? If not, don’t sweat it. You can still get the exact same feeling with this boujee bling machine. With sweet berries, bright citrus notes & just a touch of rose on the nose, she’s one heavy hitter that’s heavy on the glitter.

Halfway through our journey we were awakened from our cryo-sleep capsules to investigate a distress beacon in deep space. In the recesses of a deserted alien craft our crew discovered what could only be described as a dank-ass weed farm under a layer of green mist. Science Officer Dr. McWook returned to the ship with ten pounds of sweet, fruity, gooey gassy flower attached to his face. It seemed to be keeping him alive. We returned the specimen to Earth for further testing.